Whatya Want From me?
by SinsRose
Summary: Slightly –AU. After the AMA performance, Tommy leaves the group. He never expected months later that he would come out of the closet and then two years later meet him as a completely new person. Adommy Fluff Slash Adam/Tommy Two-shot
1. Whatya want from me?

_**Warnings, slight slash, angst moments**_

_**Disclaimer – **_**Don't own**_**Thomas Joe Ratliff **_**or**_** Adam Lambert. **_

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_Two Years Later _

I stared off into the distance of the club; I didn't pay much attention to the masses of bodies that were dancing. The lights flashing as I stared off into empty space drinking down a small shot of vodka that burned my throat. I glanced up one more to the dancers before turning back in my seat. It had been two years since I ditched the group after the American Music Awards. More like, I told myself, I did it to ditch _**Adam **_out of fear of attraction. Which I had been right about, I didn't want to remember it, and I dug my fingernails into my palm and a year ago and a few months after the ordeal I realized I had been bisexual after his shocking performance that everyone was talking about. I had to lie on my last name, giving no connection to the band, dammed fans.

I swallowed the last of the drink, letting the burn slip down my throat and then turned around in my stool and glanced out to the dancing people, still nothing of interests I turned back again. Beside me someone sat down, I could make out a black leather vest, with a tight muscle shirt underneath it, followed with tighter leather jeans. A few chains dangled off them and a pentagram hung off the stranger's neck with a ruby imbedded in the center of it. I could see from my eye covered with my currently dried slivery blue hair that the eyes looking at the club with excitement were blue. A wave of nausea went through my stomach.

I grabbed my head phone that was dangling on the inside of my hoodie and threw one of them in, my sweatshirt was halfway unzipped showing a pale blue shirt followed by torn styled light blue skinny jeans. I frowned at the song shaking my head, and turned it off my stomach still acting funny. My hand on the table was shaking the black ring on it hitting the table. The stranger turned to face me and I bit my lip hard enough to make myself taste my blood. Adam was sitting beside me his hair in the usual manner, his guy liner darker than normal. He tapped one of his hands against the bar another running though his hair in a worried manor.

His eyes met my eyes, but he frowned staring at me. "You look familiar, do I know you?" He asked quietly.

"No." I lied quickly but it was said quietly to be convincing.

He sighed picking up the tequila, and drank a little of it and then sat it back down on the table. I watched him for a second then laid out a ten to pay my bill. "You sure you haven't met me?" His voice was slightly detached. I cringed at what I must have caused.

"No, but who am I talking to?" I answered quietly again.

"Adam, you've probably heard the controversy on the American Music Awards." He answered sourly.

I tried to make simple conversation with him. "Yeah, a close friend had me watch it. I heard rumors your tour got held up because your bassist left." I said simply going to grab my change but instead ordered another shot, this time coke and rum.

His expression was hurt for a second. "Yeah, I haven't heard from him at all. He hasn't contacted us at all." Adam's gaze lingered on my eyes searching for emotion which he found none.

"Shame, maybe he needed time to think." I was slightly voicing my own thoughts.

"It's my fault honestly, never should have kissed the guy." His voice sounded dead as he said those words to me.

"Shit happens and you can't do anything about it, but how's the publicity? I asked him trying to get him off the subject of me, if only Adam knew.

"Still have plenty of fans. " Adam took another sip of his drink.

I sighed staring at the I-pod I owned pulling it out of my pocket. The customized pentagram on the back caught his attention. I hit the power off letting him look at it; it wasn't the same I-pod I carried when traveling with them, I had been sure to leave that at my apartment. Adam apparently found his name and snorted then glanced at what I had from his CD. "Not a major fan is you?" He asked me I grimaced in distaste thinking at the song _**For Your Entertainment.**_

"I'm not found of that particular song." I answered I knew what he was referring to.

He didn't speak and he gave the I-pod back turning away. I had expected that. "Did that song do damage to you."I asked him.

"You don't know the half of it." My eyes caught sight of the covered up scars on his wrists, but apparently he had tried to hide them with cover-up and failed. I bit my lip hard. I felt raw tears wanting to make them known but knew I couldn't.

Another wave of nausea hit me but this time I knew I felt sick. "I need to go." My voice sounded almost dead.

"Can you give me one thing?" I glanced at him, my hand shaking. He held out a pen and paper, I knew what he wanted. I wrote him down a number, my cell phone my other one. I scribbled lazily my name, just a first name Thomas if I wrote Tommy who knows what he would have said. Adam smirked for a fraction of a second before I vanished off, his number burning a hole in my heart.

I had crashed on my bed when I had gotten home the next day and when I got up Jake was staring at me funny when I walked out of my room in the apartment. "Long night?" He asked me. I looked towards him for a brief moment.

My cell vibrated when I was about to answer him, Adam's number showed, I held a finger up to Jake to motion him to be quiet. I picked up the phone. "Ello?" I answered it.

Adam's voice was quiet on the other line. "What's up?"

"I'm somewhat busy; my roommate needs help with something." I lied to him trying to avoid talking.

"Alright. I'll let you go then."He briefly hung off and I could vaguely hear Monte yell at him before he did. I laughed hanging up and turned to face Jake.

He didn't look convinced. "Who was that baby?" He asked me, I had been dating him for about a year.

"An old friend that I don't want to deal with at the moment," I answered him. "He's kind of someone I rather not see." Jake smiled.

"I have a shift I need to go to till three am baby." He lightly kissed me on the forehead softly.

"I know. I made a note of it a few weeks ago." I answered purring.

"I'll see you later alright?" He kissed my lips for a brief second, before getting up to leave. "See ya baby."

I didn't blush when he kissed me, I didn't feel anything at all. I silently broke down and cried as soon as he left the apartment.

I don't know how long I stayed in my room sobbing, but I knew I couldn't live like this. I wiped my eyes, staring at my reflection before punching the mirror cracks appearing on the surface and the jagged pieces fell onto the floor with my blood on them. I stared at my knuckles cut from the glass, I felt numb. I grabbed a thing of gauze wrapping it on my bleeding hand before picking up the broken mirror shards.

I threw them away thinking of Adam's scars. I knew I was the one causing them but I didn't know how to tell him. I was afraid of my feelings for the singer and I knew it. I hesitated then picked up my cell phone dialing the familiar number. "Hey." I choked out.

Adam seemed worried as he answered. "What's wrong?" I could hear him let out a hiss of pain. I could hear Monte's yelling of _**what the fuck were you thinking?**_

"Nothing just fell." I lied. Who's yelling at you?" I knew I hit a nerve as he answered.

"You don't need to worry. I just did something stupid. Everyone is frustrated. We need him back." He answered and I heard Monte yell again, and I heard Adam swear as Monte took his phone.

"Listen kid whoever you are stop"-

"Shut the fuck up." I hissed at him, I heard him swallow, then a door slam by the sound of it, it was Adam.

"Tommy? Does he know?" He whispered to me into the phone.

I swallowed. "He only knows me by Thomas. Has he been hurting himself?" I stared at my bloody knuckles.

"Where'd you find him kid?" Monte asked me.

"A club I go to once a week. Has he been hurting himself?" I whispered more urgently.

Monte swallowed. "Yeah. We need you back; I don't know how much longer he'll last."

"I come back just don't let him see me when I get there." Monte hung up, I already knew was they were.

I had settled back into the group by nightfall, Monte had given me a slap on the face but I deserved it anyway for being so irrational. Most of my stuff had been left here, I went into my door and shut and locked it behind me going out to stand over the balcony that overlooked one of La's beaches.

The stars were out and the beach house we were residing in was peaceful. I sat on the chair I had been used to sitting on years ago. I stared blankly out into the ocean trying to calm myself, as soon as Adam knew; well I didn't know what he would say. I got up from the balcony before heading out into the kitchen. I opened the fridge and grabbed a bottle green tea, wincing as I heard yelling.

"Don't you _**understand**_? I fell in love with him!" I heard Adam hiss and my blood froze.

Monte and Adam walked into view auguring furiously and I didn't say a word. My body was frozen as Adam kept yelling and then Monte's eyes went wide as he saw me standing in the kitchen, my blood had rushed to my face. Very slowly Adam turned to face me and his eyes went wide. "T-Tommy." He managed to choke out. His eyes were frozen on mine.

I bit my lip. I could clearly see the scars and I felt water hit my eyes, I walked away from him slamming my door as I went into my room blinded by my tears, I went to the balcony my drink in my hand, and wrapped my arms around my knees. _Why did it hurt so much?_ I let a cry escape my lips tears falling down them as I stared out into the ocean.

There was a knock on my door and I didn't answer it at all. I got up and grabbed my bass and began to strum cords, familiar cords I hadn't played in awhile, before I realized it I had began to play part of Adam's song, but stopped as he realized it, the other side of the door got quiet and he didn't hear Monte.

It was awhile before he opened his door; Adam was leaning against the wall beside his door. His eyes were shut and he had been crying. "I'm so sorry." I whispered into the air, as I looked at him, I went to leave him again but he caught me by the hand sending a jolt down my spine.

"You don't need to be." Adam replied as he stood up looking at me. "I didn't think that performance over when I did it. I should of-"

"I'm afraid Adam." I whispered, and his eyes widened. "I don't want people to know." I whispered to the black haired singer still clinging onto me.

"You felt it that night to?" He asked, I nodded.

Adam looked me in the eyes I could the choice he wanted to make, slowly he cupped my face in his hands bringing his mouth and our mouth to join. The kiss wasn't rough like the night he had first kissed me but gentle and I could feel the passion as he kissed my lips softly. I didn't know how long he was against the wall his hands above him as I kissed him, it felt like hours. It could have been hours, it could have been days. As me and Adam broke apart a thin band of spit connected our lips, I looked him in the eyes, they were half filled with lust the other raw passion. My breathing was slightly off and I panted staring into his eyes.

Adam smiled something I hadn't seen since I saw him again. "Promise you won't leave me baby?" Adam whispered to me as we stood up, I opened my door to the bedroom and he shut it behind him. We both went to sit on the bed; he pulled me onto his lap my head lying on his chest. It felt so safe so calming. I shut my eyes listening to his heart beat. I felt comforted as his arms wrapped around my waist, I felt so tired like I hadn't slept in days. "I promise." I whispered as my mind drifted into the realm of dreams.

There was a muttered whisper of I love you before I fully drifted into my dreams, my hand clasped with Adam's own hand as we fell to the realm of dreams.


	2. All the things she said

_**Warnings, slight slash, fluff, sexy singing. (Watch the strut Video from the kradsion concert that's were this idea came from.)**_

_**Disclaimer – **_**Don't own **_**Thomas Joe Ratliff **_**or**_** Adam Lambert, or the song Strut- Adam Lambert owns that.**_

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_Sequel _

_All the Things She Said _

I panted, excitement running though my veins as we got off stage. I didn't know how much I missed this, but my body seemed to adore the screaming crowds and the fans and Adam. Adam was my reason for staying even living though this life. I grabbed my water bottle from backstage drinking slowly letting the water drip down my parched mouth. It felt refreshing, my bass leaning against the wall in the backstage, I was tired. It took a lot out of me to perform in front of thousands of fans, even more not to jump Adam. It had been only three months since he began sharing hushed whispers with me on stage, and teasing me, but it was so risky.

The media wanted this; they wanted the scoop on why I left. Why Adam had the markings on his wrists. If we where dating. I hardly got a private moment with Adam the paparazzi were so nosy. I could hardly even kiss him, hell we hadn't even let Monte find out he would have said something to Lisa. We had kept the whole relationship secret; Adam agreed it was better off that way considering I was supposed to be straight. We were lucky if we could even get a hotel room and spend the night in each other's arms. I hadn't gotten around to sex because of the tabloids; I didn't feel like seeing myself in them.

A small peck to my cheek woke me from my thoughts. I titled my head slightly to the side and was met with Adam's amused gaze. I could feel the heat rush to my face and growled slightly at him. "You'll get us caught." I whispered to him, our hands touching enough to give heat but easy to pass off as just brushing by accident.

"Hmmm, like I wouldn't be that careless." Adam shot back, I grinned clearly he was still so over confident.

"Sure you wouldn't." I said dryly. Adam smirked back at me as Monte came into view.

"You guys going to hurry it up? We've a song left." Monte said taking a swing of water.

I moved my hand away from Adam's, Monte wasn't paying attention but he was bitching at us to get back on stage, I rolled my eyes grabbing my bass. "What are we playing?" I asked Adam who was touching up eyeliner. He was wearing a gray jacket over a black- well off grey shirt with black leather jeans that were clinging to his ass. A belt was across his waist, and chains dangled off the jeans. The necklace he wore was the double guitar picks, sliver rings glinted off his hands. The simple gray eye shadow covered eye lids. "Strut." Adam replied to me.

I grinned at him. Monte ushered us to the small concert we were doing, smaller than usual. Adam asked onto stage, me taking my place in my spot. I could hear fans screaming a he began to sing. _"__I want to start a revolution. A type of personal solution, we all have got our own pollution."_ He gave a smirk into the fans.

_"It's all about the execution._" He gripped microphone with one hand, and slid it down as he went on singing, his voice made my body shiver. "_You got something to say your hands are tied. Open your mouth, open it wide. Let the freedom begin Get on the floor, just let it drop _He dropped, his hand sliding down his microphone pole_, _Adam slide back up one hand resting on the stand._ Don't it feel good, don't it feel hot? Feel the fire within." _I knew what was coming next.

_"I wanna see you strut (strut, strut) C'mon walk for me._ Adam began to thrust his hips, and I had to resist the temptation for now. He shakes his hips as he went on singing, then I saw him walk over towards were I was playing. Adam moved close to me singing._ Strut (strut, strut) How you wanna be. Everybody's looking for some love,_ He moved closer to me I could almost feel his breathing, his back faced me as I played, I leaned against his shoulder for a second playing, then before he walked away again he slapped my ass. I bit back a moan moving on playing finding it hard to focus, and he walked back singing smirking._ But they don't know How to let it all hang out and that's why they're solo (solo, solo) don't wanna be solo (solo, solo) don't wanna be solo"_

Adam turned to face me while the guitar was playing moving his hips in a matter that should be a sin on stage, one hand on his leg as he moved his hips, his eyes taunting his mouth fixed in a devious smirk, still gripping the microphone stand. _"We're a complicated nation and now we're in a situation._ I crept behind him playing staring him down; I know Adam could feel my eyes staring at his ass, he swung his hips as he sensed me._ Let's take a Maybelline vacation and get yourself some validation."_

I walked away as he began the next verse. _"You got something to say your hands are tied."  
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Adam from the corner of my eye as he sang the next line I saw him suck on his finger, smirking, I felt my body getting hotter._ "Open your mouth, open it wide Let the freedom begin_." Adam stood beside me singing, dropping onto the stage and back in front of me I tried to pay attention to my bass._ "Get on the floor, just let it drop Don't it feel good, don't it feel hot?" _Adam walked away again and I focused more on my bass_. "Feel the fire within." _I nearly moaned again catching him from where I was standing simulating jerking off a guy's cock with the microphone stand, was he trying to get me to squirm?_ "I wanna see you strut (strut, strut)C'mon walk for me Strut (strut, strut)How you wanna be Everybody's lookin' for some love But they don't know." _Adam was dancing with those sinful hips again; it was getting harder to focus not to mention my jeans were getting tighter_. "How to let it all hang out And that's why they're solo (solo, solo)Don't wanna be solo (solo, solo)Don't wanna be solo."_ Adam danced walking the other way shaking his hips. I watched him from my eyes barley transfixed as everyone else was by this man.

Adam stood on the stand, his voice sounding so sexy he sang, and so sinful. _"I'll be your mirror Darling, let your hair down". _He began to swing his hips close to the stand_. "Show me what you're working with and let me see you. _Adam took the microphone in his hands as he sang the high note_. "Strut (strut, strut), strut (strut, strut) How you wanna be."_

Adam walked towards me again, oh god I wasn't going to last at this rate. "_Everybody's lookin' for some love but they don't know. _Adam was inches from breathing on my lips; my lips had a smirk of their own._ "how to let it all hang out" _As he went forward I moved by body back in a manner that made us look like we were teasing each other, I could see the sexual frustration rolling off Adam, his lips wanting to touch mine._ "and that's why they're solo" (solo, solo) don't wanna be solo (solo, solo) don't wanna be solo."_

_"Strut for me and show me what you're working with. Strut for me and show me what you're working with." _I played right beside him the bass and guitar hitting their loudest points as he sang, kicking his leg in the air a few times as the song finished. All we could hear was screaming as we closed the show, Adam had a mischievous smirk on his face.

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I was safely in Adam's room as soon as we got back. My face was flushed, the echo of the performance still in my mind. I had stripped myself of my shirt, the felt so hot, I felt like I was burning. I moaned against the cool wallpaper in his bedroom, anything could help me right now. The way he touched me on the stage, the thrill I got from it, the ecstasy. I panted softly against the wall, I needed him. The bathroom door opened and Adam remerged shirtless and the only clothing he had on was tight black boxers.I moaned on spot at the sight of him. Adam smirked going over to the bed and straddling me against the wall. My body let a needy whimper, my body on fire with desire. I arched against him desperate for any type of relief. Adam laughed, I glared at him, pulling him by the hair, and I pulled him into a desperate kiss filled with desire. His reaction was at once his fingers tangling in my hair roughly; his tongue invading my mouth in a rough kiss, I moaned into it caused a shiver to trail down his body.

"Fuck." Adam whimpered pulling away from the kiss a band of saliva connecting us. I sprang at him, my mouth latching onto his neck sucking and biting the skin causing Adam to throw his head back in a long moan, his hands gripping my hair tighter. A harder suck caused him to arch against me rubbing against my groin. I let out a throaty moan panting hard.

My mouth left his neck with a slight slick pop, he moaned in protest. I put a finger on my lips and smirked. Then next thing I knew, I was pinned against the wall my hands tangled in his hair, his lips violently sucking on mine enough to make them swollen. I threw back my head in a cry of bliss as he bit down sharply on my shoulder, his hands finding my nipples and pinching them. I let out another shudder squirming underneath him, bucking in my want. The rest happened in a blur, my mind was in a haze of desire all I could remember was him screaming my name.

We found out later that evening when I and Adam awoke, Monte did indeed know and somehow had convicted the media I was indeed straight. What a load of bullshit then again they'll never see the hickeys.

"I love you so much baby." Adam whispered against my skin.

"Love you too baby." I said as I kissed him softly as we faded into the world of oblivion, our skin on skin, hands clasped. Everything was perfect.


End file.
